What to do?

Its taken over five years from writing to filming my production 'Christian' and over twenty years to finally film my first feature.
From the initial ideas of the storyline to the build up of filming, I was very excited to finally begin work on my first major project.
I've done short films and corporate productions in the past, even done some acting too. All of it was great and exciting to work on.
But now, I feel like the magic has been taken away from me.
Whether its because of the lack of sleep I've had over the past six weeks during the shoot or its just something else. But my views and ambitions for the industry have taken a downward path and I'm unsure whether I want to turn back.

Film is something I've always loved from an early age. Its always been a dream of mine to work in film or television.
I always went to the cinema on my own as I found it a great place to  escape the troubles I was experiencing when I was younger.
It was my place to relax and it made me forget about my worries even if it was for just two hours.

Now, for some strange reason. My views towards the industry have changed, leaving me with serious doubt that after thirty years of pursuing my dreams, whether I should have listened to those who have never really supported me and took that step back to think - is this actually the career for me?

Some of you who know me and are reading this will be quiet surprised at what I'm writing.
But the truth of the matter is, I'm seriously fed up of trying to prove myself. Its been a constant up hill battle to convince people that it can be a great, exciting job to work in no matter how big or small the work can be. But because of the constant disagreements and lack of support throughout my life with people its left me feeling quite sad and unfulfilled.

Over the years, I've walked onto sets, professional and amateur, and its given me an overwhelming 'buzz' just being there either watching people being creative or being part of a production team as an actor or cameraman. Its also given me a lot of respect for those doing this work as its not an easy job bringing a script to the screen, and those who think it is seriously need a reality check.

That 'buzz' I mentioned is an experience in life which gives you a tingle of electricity inside your body and makes the hair's on the back of your neck stand up because your overwhelmed with excitement.

But as time has gone on, I feel like that 'buzz' has disappeared.
For some reason I woke up the other day and thought is this really what I want? Am I chasing a dead dream from my younger days that's seriously beginning to bring me down? What true support have I had throughout my pursuit of happiness except from a small majority of people?

I think this reality check has hit home during the shoot of 'Christian'. I've started feeling lost, annoyed, depressed and my love of film fading fast.
I used to go home from a day's work and watch a film to relax.Watching movies gave me inspiration to shoot 'Christian' and write more projects. But it just doesn't do it anymore and I think its this shoot that has seriously knocked me on my ass.

Now I'll have to put my hands up and be honest to say its not been a smooth running production, its been far from it.
From the moment we started shooting, problems tainted the production from locations and businesses dropping out last minute, frustrations from cast and crew because of the schedule constantly changing, technical problems and no major financial support throughout. Because of this I've slowly begun to hate this industry with a passion.
I think if you've got the connections and the money, then film making is definitely a job to do. But if you've got little to no support from businesses and people, trying to keep a healthy relationship with your friends and keep your sanity all at the same time. Then I'll advise you against it, because all its done to me is turned me against something I've loved all my life and put friendships at risk. To be honest, its not worth it.

At the end of it all, I hope all the hard work and time gone into this production does pay off. As its fast becoming my last production I ever want to be involved in. Its going to take a lot of convincing to haul me back into the game not just for the above reason, but for several more.

ENGRRLAND

Well, where do I start my rant about our so-called World Cup team?


I know a few of you may well defend them, but in all honesty their hearts and souls were not in that tournament what-so-ever. If it was, we would have seen matches like we saw in the qualifiers but we didn't.

Yesterday's defeat against Germany could have been a spectacular match, but it wasn't. In fact, the England squad should have taken notes on how to play quality football just like the Germans displayed.
Our team were a complete joke. The players are no longer in it for the game or the love of football, but for the "stunning" wags, the overpaid paycheck, sponsorship deals and publicity and its all this crap that is ruining the game so many of us love.

Something else I don't understand is why are we playing the same crap players in these tournaments, when they've never managed to win anything in the past? Nevermind sacking the manager, get rid of these numpties who can't play. Bring in a fresh pair of legs, some younger talent who would put the effort in and not roll around on the floor or try pot luck shots at goal to make attempts at getting their faces on the front page as heroes when they're simply not.

Anyway, kudos to the Germans. You played far superior to us and you deserve to go through.
As for England, hang your heads in shame. You're not worth the press coverage, the paycheck or to wear an England shirt. You best go now and think about what you've done. Now go on, bugger off down your own end before I tell your father!

Christian - Production Update

Filming began on the new Dracula film 'Christian' in Whitby, North Yorkshire.

The Monk's Haven Cafe was the setting for the first three scenes filmed on Monday and Tuesday night with Carl Isherwood (above), David Brown and Sarah Robinson all giving great performances.

The first day's shoot always is the 'bum squeaker' for me as you never know what could happen.
But thankfully all went well. There were a few funny moments during the shoot and the odd joke being played on David (Det. Richards) as an ice-breaker to relax everyone which seemed to have done the trick.

The only one problem we've had so far is the damn British Summer weather being a pain again.
Its done nothing but rain, and rain hard in Whitby since Sunday, which has forced us to reschedule a couple of days filming until the weather improves allegedly next week.

But if all goes well (weather wise) we should be filming the vampire scenes, where the actors get to don the old prosthetics and teeth. A moment I'm excited to see, especially seeing Carl (Christian) in his full vampire slaying wardrobe and Dracula on set marking his return to Whitby, which will no doubt excite the crowds.

I'll be posting more on here plus you can keep upto date with things on the official movie site and facebook page.

Camera's Roll Soon!

It's taken five years to write and nine months of pre-production work before we finally start cameras rolling on 'Christian'.

To say my nerves are shot would be a big fat fib, I'm like jelly at the moment as I've got so much riding on this production and the excitement that its created amongst people has been scary. But, I have a vision for this film and if I stay focused and work past the obstacles that come my way then I'm sure everything will turn out fine.

I've got a great cast and crew who are very excited to get things rolling, but I can't believe how fast its all come about.

Ahh well, here it goes. At 6pm on 7th of June 2010, the first scene will begin shooting in Whitby. Fingers crossed it all goes well.

By the way, that's the new poster! :)

Dr Screw?

So, 43 people out of how many millions have complained about last Saturday's (01/05/10) episode of 'Doctor Who'.
Those 43 people including Mediawatch UK thought the scene where Amy Pond tries to undress the Doctor and jokes that its been a long time since he had some loving was deemed inappropriate for a children's programme.

Hang on? (Screeeeeeech!) Since when has Doctor Who been a children's programme? Its not on the CBBC channel is it? No! Its shown in the prime-time schedule isn't it? Yes! So who classed it as a kids programme? Gee let me think.... I'm guessing the one's who are making a mountain out of a mole-hill over this whole thing.

The scene probably went over most kids heads anyway. Its obviously the Mary Whitehouse club stirring the pot because they got nothing else to do. So here's an idea. Why don't those 43 people get together and create a club where you all take turns to jump off a cliff.

Stop being pathetic people, its just a television programme. One of which is a prime-time show and NOT a kids programme. Oh by the way, the kids version of this is actually 'The Sarah Jane Adventures'. Get it right!

Stop Moaning!

Okay, so you've got an idiot who decides to bring a baseball game to a stand still, as he runs amock around the pitch like a kid who's broke free from his reigns.

But then, Mr Policeman comes along with his friend Mr Tazer and shoots him bang on in the back, bringing the whole thing to an abrupt end.
The guy is then escorted off the pitch and arrested. No harm done.

So what the hell is the problem? Did the officer go over the top by shooting him with a tazer? Erm, no. I don't think so. Especially as this idiot brought a game to a halt, threw a fence and sent staff on a goose chase around the pitch all in the name of fun.
I think the officer made the right choice. It stopped the idiot, he was unharmed and was quickly escorted off the pitch so the game could continue. What's wrong with that? Answer... Nothing! 
Kudos to the Officer and nice shooting by the way :)

Busy Couple of Weeks

Its been a few months since I last wrote on here, but its all been go-go-go!

We've finally cast the five main characters in my Dracula movie 'Christian', after auditions were held in March and April. So a press release will be out shortly revealing those lucky devils. Along with a call for extras and supporting cast for the remaining parts.

I'm still trailing through the soundtrack applications. We had hundreds sent to us and we have to narrow it down to around six to eight artists/composers.

Got the first test footage through of some CGI effects for my film and they look awesome!

Filming in on course for its June start, with a trailer hopefully out by August.

If everything goes to plan (which normally it doesn't) we'll be entering the film in the British Horror Film Festival in Bournemouth and several other film festivals throughout 2010/11. Before that we'll be hoping to premiere the film in Whitby with the location to be announced.

Keep updated with the production by visiting the official film's website - http://www.christianmovie.co.uk/

Keep smilin' peeps :)